Thursday, August 13, 2015

Coming to Grips With a Loss!

My Cousins All Together!
This has been a strange summer in the herb garden and in addition, I lost my cousin, John at 55 to suicide in June.  I feel as though I need to talk about it and I apologize if you are hoping for an herbal post.  Maybe it will turn into one in the end.

You see I feel badly about his death because I don't think The Herbal Husband and I did enough to reach out to him when he needed it.  He loved his church family and his mother and sisters, but not enough to keep him on this earth.  As his pastor told me, John was a hard nut to crack.

He would reach out to us periodically and ask us to join him at church, Church of the Ascension.  Neither of us are church goers and I regret not going to spend time with him.  Sometimes we were traveling and couldn't get together.  He came to dinner at our house just once.  I wish it had been more.

And before this goes downhill anymore, the funeral service for him was the most beautiful one I had ever been to.  It is my hope that John was watching from above and saw how many people cared and loved him.  His ashes were placed in the crypt in the church.  A fitting place where he can spend eternity in one of the places he loved so much.  Thank you for letting me sharing my grief with you.  John was a character and very bright who will be missed by many.  RIP John.
A Sunflower for My Cousin!


FlowerLady Lorraine said...

Dear dear LVL and HH ~ My heart aches for you as you deal with your loss. It's not easy. Keep the good, loving memories alive in your hearts.

Love, hugs and prayers ~ FlowerLady

Linda Goudelock said...

I'm sorry for your loss. My brother committed suicide and we're still trying to understand why. I suppose it will always remain a mystery. Perhaps God is using this as a reminder to the living to reach out and be more involved with those around us. Though I don't live near my sisters I do write more often now to let them know they are loved and thought of.

Rosemary said...

Sending you comfort at this difficult time, hoping you find peace and happiness with the beautiful memories you have of your cousin John, and sending cyber-sprigs of rosemary for remembrance. Hugs to you, Nancy and to the herbal husband. XXOO,Nancy

Lemon Verbena Lady said...

Thanks ladies for all your thoughts and prayers! We both really appreciate them! xo